You would probably normally not think of safeguarding yourself from your own family members. Your family are your loved ones. You’ve been together from the very beginning. Your sister, brother and your cousins are probably all your very best friends.
Anyone who is related to you would surely only want what’s best for you. They would never manipulate you, abuse your mistrust or use you for their own gain. They are your relatives, you share the same blood (often said about family in drama tv and movies). They are the safest people for you to rely on for emotional and physical support; they are always there for you.
Your sister wouldn’t try to get you to do her University assignments for her while she chats idly on her mobile to her friends. She would never act dumb and ask you tedious questions just to beg you to write down the answers for her cause she “can’t quite understand”. She wouldn’t then over-react when you try to make your excuses to go do something else in fear of her getting caught on the telephone while everyone thinks she is doing her work…? Would she?
Your cousin wouldn’t manipulate you into thinking other relatives think badly of you so that you don’t take up their time and energy, just so she could get all the attention she wants. She wouldn’t then go and expose your personal problems you’ve shared with her to get your other relatives to hate you if you try to expose her for what she’s done. She wouldn’t try to make you look like a bad person or try to help keep you sad or depressed if you try to improve yourself…
But these are the sorts of things friends have told me they have experienced, and I have had similar occurrences in my life also.
I’ve tried subtly requesting not to be treated badly, I’ve hinted at my becoming stronger and my no longer allowing people to use and abuse me. I even resorted to openly requesting certain relatives that certain behaviour had to stop. Though there are only a few people in our family circle that were openly and deliberately treating me badly, it is enough to make a person feel depressed and alone.
I questioned myself and why I felt upset and confused from encounters with certain relatives for years without realising that they were treating me badly and using me.
Once I improved my self confidence and worked on certain bad thinking habits I had formed about myself, I was able to see how I was being treated. I decided that enough was enough and I ended up cutting certain people from my life that just weren’t open to changing how they treated me.
As always I turn towards my crafts in solitude, but now I also have my wonderful husband and beautiful baby to consolidate me. I have had to keep several people in my family out of my life in order to remain happier, it’s been hard a bit lonelier. Sometimes I do feel sadness at having had to cut certain people from my life, but I know that I am a much happier, stress-free me!
I’ve always had trouble focussing on one single type of craft long enough to get really good at it and a majority of my craft work always got thrown out eventually or adapted to create something else. I don’t mind though, it’s the actual creative process that usually helps and uplifts me!
Mainly in the past I usually used my Fashion Design sketches to keep me happy, for approximately four or five years now, I’ve turned to Scrapbooking and other hand crafts.
I’ll post some of my design sketches into the gallery for everyone to see, though they are usually too dramatic to easily sew or sell, I really am proud of some of them! Then I’ll also start posting more of my craft projects for everyone to see! It’s always to get creative works out to encourage and help clear the mind from negative, annoying incidents in life!
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