Decluttering really does soothe the soul…

Suddenly we found out that we have no choice, we have to move to a new house within only approximately two months…

I had no choice but to get my self into gear and really get to decluttering my craft room. There is no way I will be having a whole room to keep them in once we move house and it was getting way too full of hoarded “stuff” I thought I would use for making craft items.

I started the only way I knew how, to slowly go through every pile of papers etc and see exactly what I had been keeping. I sorted them into two easy piles to try to stop myself keeping things I was unsure about. I had one pile for definitely necessary things to keep and only one pile for things to throw out.

It’s taken me almost two and a half weeks, as I was only working on it slowly about 1-3 hours at the most per day, a lot of those days I only got an hour to work on it so it took a while. Now I’m down to about 9 boxes for the whole room and I am still working it to reduce it even more. Two boxes are for the books/novels I read that are my absolute favourites, two boxes are of journals and mini albums that I have made, and I’m down to about  five boxes for actual craft supplies (including paper for journals I am making).

I have to say that already I feel a huge amount of accomplishment and a lifting of emotions etc. I feel a lot lighter and only have some small level of stress from trying to reduce the craft supplies even more without compromising my craft work too much.

What tips or ideas do you use when you have to declutter and reduce things you own?

 

How to figure it all out…?

I signed in to my Etsy store just a few days ago to take a look to consider whether I should shut it down as I wasn’t getting any sales. I was about to do what my husband suggested and give up on my crafting as it was taking too much of my time and energy that I aught to concentrate on making my son and husband happy and well cared for.

When I logged in with the idea that I aught to close it down and get rid of my craft supplies, I saw that I a had a sale, and it was one of my better priced items. It was a few days late already but I tried to message the buyer that I had been offline due to family and health reasons and I asked if they still wanted the item. They didn’t try to cancel the order or didn’t ask for their money back which had already been paid for the item so I went ahead and posted it.

So now I am deliberating on whether to continue making my junk journals as only a part time hobby, I can just list the items as I complete them and see how it goes?

What is the best way to decide such things? When and how can we know whether to give up? If anyone has any insight as to how to make such decisions please leave comments.

 

 

I can’t seem to win…

I’ve never been good at getting along with people, it seems that my whole life I struggled to get people to like me. I’ve never seemed to know the right way to behave, how much and when to talk etc, or never known the right things to say.

It seems I still don’t know what to say and when, which topics are ok to discuss and I don’t seem to know enough about the outside world to be able to have enough different topics to discuss with anyone. I deliberately stopped watching news on tv a few years ago as I found all the reports about crime and accidents depressing.

There was too much news about how badly people were behaving against one another and too much blood and death going on in the world. Not watching enough tv can also be a bad thing also though as you also miss out on all the general and good news. It can then be hard to know what to talk about with people, as you then dont know the general world news.

I can’t get along with my husband much as we just don’t have hardly any interests etc in common, so we don’t have much topics we can discuss with each other. If I mention any of my personal hobbies like art or craft too much he thinks I’m doing too much hobbies and he thinks I’m neglecting the house duties etc. If I talk too much about my parents or other relatives too much he thinks I care too much about them and then he thinks it means that I care more about my other relatives more then him or our son. I can never seem to know the limits of when and how much to do anything in order to make anyone happy with me.

That’s all I know to talk about though, I start talking to him more about the house and what daily tasks I have completed for that day thinking that will make him happier talking to me, but then he says I don’t need to list him all I’ve done that day etc. I try to talk to him about our son more, about what we do during the day etc but then he usually always finds something to tell me off about as I always manage to forget something I should have done with our son etc. So then I tend to always feel that I am better off not to talk too much about our son as I always manage to get myself told off because I manage my time with our son so badly.

If  I talk to my Mum or any of my friends or relatives more then a few times a week and my husband know’s about it he tells me off again that he thinks I care more about my parents then I do about him and our son. If I see anyone more then a few times a month, again my husband blames me for caring more about other’s then I care about him and our son.

Half the time I definitely feel like I just don’t know what I’m doing in my attempts to communicate with people, I just know how to get along with people…

It’s not a nice feeling, I get too lonely if I void communicating with people too much, yet I also end up regretting most of my efforts to try to communicate with people as I just can’t seem to get along with anyone for more then five minutes. Then I end up questioning who I am and whether I’m actually a good person or not, I feel like I must be one of the worst people if I can’t manage to have any good normal conversations with anyone…

I just can’t ever seem able to get along with anyone and it makes me more sad and depressed…

Questions about my role in life…

It can be very hard in the busy schedule of running around trying to manage and manoeuvre your way through hectic schedules and trying to meet high quality standards in everything you do. Some people still think and argue that housewives have an easier time of it compared to working people, but for someone with mental illness even the schedule of a housewife can seem busy, hectic and hard to manage.

Also there is the need to meet quality standards of cleanliness whilst looking after busy kids. You have to keep the house clean while chasing and cleaning after every new dirty area your kids leave in a mess, they can leave toys lying around or even bits of food crumbs or teared up bits of paper everywhere. You could just have finished vacuuming your house, only to find the lounge room full of bits of teared up paper, then you have to tidy and clean up all over again.

Then once any of your children has reached three years old they are expected to start schedules of regular playgroups or three year old kindergarten and you still have to do the shopping, pay bills etc. Cooking can take anywhere from half an hour to a few hours depending on what you make, then there is the almost never ending piles of dishes from meals and snacks.

It can actually be pretty hard to meet any sort of timing or scheduling sheet you might plan up even without a mental illness. When you have a mental illness it can be a pain or maybe impossible to try to stick to any sort of schedule because you also have your emotional or mental symptoms to deal with while you try to juggle all the stress and confusion of how to keep everything clean and under control.

Are you supposed to entertain and keep your children busy so they are learning and not making a mess, cleaning up after the mess and spills they create, doing the general cleaning or cooking for the nights meal? Having so much to do can be almost overwhelming if you do suffer from a mental illness. Then if you try to fulfil your own needs for hobbies or friends, it can be an almost impossible task of getting everything done.

Then there is also the possibility that your feeling needy to be pursuing any sort of hobby or ideas of working from home it can cause even more chaos. Learning how to fulfil your needs of achievement and how to feel as though you have a purpose in life can be tricky. Some people say that just by managing the general tasks of being a housewife and mother should be fulfilling in its own right.

What if it’s simply not enough or you feel like you’re simply not good at it no matter how hard you try? What if the place you’re given by life and the people around you doesn’t match your expectations for life? What if it doesn’t suit your personality type and you struggle to fulfil the role you’ve been given?

I’ve been told by a few people with mental illness that my need to be creative and to try to get myself known somehow and to gain some credit for my creative activities is a symptom of mental illness. My husband is also still trying also to get me to give up my craft hobbies so I can focus solely on my duties as a housewife.

So almost a week ago I started a little experiment to see if how I feel living without undertaking any major creative project and see if I’m able to live happily or not. So far there is a slight decrease in my frustration of trying to find time and ideas on how to get my projects posted online. I find myself able to focus better on most of my daily tasks I try to get done as apart of my role as housewife.

I still look for creative ways I can come up with activities to try with my son to try to give him some home schooling though. This means that I do have a bit of a way to go before I can say I have totally given up on my creative activities 100%. You do tend to use some creative ideas to try to keep children entertained and busy with activities that they can also learn from. If I’m not meant to create art and craft to sell I can at least channel some of my creative ideas and energy into creating activities for my son and have less guilt and less blame for wasting time on useless crafts.

Obsessed – Or Is Craft Therapy a Necessity?

mermaid-1-etsy

Am I more content to work on my online Etsy store then I am in talking to my family and friends in real life?

I just came back online again after a few days trying to abstain from coming online to test a theory of my husbands and someone on a Facebook group that I was chatting to a few days ago. There is some belief that a feeling of needing to communicate online and trying to use art or craft, to try to get your name even a little “known” is like a symptom of mental illness.

There seems to be a belief that being online too much is bad for people, in some ways if it becomes too much of an obsession, yes it could hamper a person. It could get in the way of the person getting more important daily chores done or could affect how much communication and attention the person gives other people in the real world.

Sometimes because people you chat to online aren’t really in front of you it can feel easier to communicate with them as there is less possibility of being hurt or embarrassed. People seem more attentive on line as they give themselves more time to concentrate better on what they online, people seem less distracted by other issues or people as they concentrate on their online conversations.

People are more inclined to think twice before they post or chat online as it’s most often done in the written format. Therefore people you communicate with online may seem nicer and more polite.

My communications online and other online activities in trying to get my artwork noticed are more therapeutic, my communications with people in real life are often riddled with pain and misunderstanding. What are we to make of this? Is there any possible meaning or reason as to why some of us really do feel more happier communicating and making friends online?

How to keep going when you’re emotionally low…

When your emotional or mental health is at a low point, it can get pretty hard to keep working at trying to improve yourself. It can be pretty hard to work on improving your emotional health when you are too busy trying to stop it from getting worse. Sometimes it may seem hard enough merely to stop yourself from getting so low that you might resort to drastic negative steps such as hurting yourself to relieve some of the emotional pain you may be feeling.

Fighting off the negative demon’s can be so hard that it takes all your emotional energy and you often feel you don’t have enough to devote to try to make yourself happier for quite some time.

However, unless you totally give up on life and take the easy way out via suicide, there is no other option but to keep going. To continue living and continue on with everyday chores and duties that are assigned to you by your sex, age and your status in life.

Once you have struck rock bottom, it’s actually pretty easy to get back up and to continue working on everything, because as I said, unless you take the easy way out, there is actually no where else for you to go and nothing else to do. Once you get to the lowest point emotionally or physically, there is no other direction to go. Once you get to the point that you can’t go any lower, you can only go higher and can only improve, as you can’t get any worse already…

Also it’s key that you try to remember and visualise other times when you know you have been in a better situation, as this reminds and shows you that you can and have done better in the past. So you can see that you actually can do better again now as well. To know and remember that you have been emotionally healthier and happier is the best motivator, as you can’t disprove to yourself that you can’t manage to improve as you have already seen yourself in a better state.

It makes the process easier to simply live every day individually without planning too much for the future and without allowing yourself to wallow in any past failure or negative thoughts. Any short amount of time you manage to get something done should be seen as an accomplishment and used to help motivate you to get more done. Give yourself small prices as a celebration for every small goal you achieve and allow yourself to be happy with all small accomplishments.

If necessary make short lists of all things that you need to get done and don’t allow yourself to worry too much about any larger goals you need to get done, as this will possibly lead to procrastination and needless worry and stress.

Use positive affirmations and anything other positive information that you find helpful to help motivate yourself. Get someone who loves you to help motivate you, or try playing happy positive songs to get yourself going.

The main thing to remember is that you are only human, and every human is known to be making mistakes once in a while and that it’s not the end of the world if mistakes are made, days continue passing and people will continue to love you no matter what.

 

Self Help Ideas To Uplift Your Mood

Depression and other bouts of low mood can really put your life perspective and ideas about yourself way down on the scale. You can end up feeling terrible and sad for most of your days and sometimes it can become a cycle of negative thought patterns and negative emotions that seems almost impossible to get out of.

There are various ways a person can help lift their mood or thought patterns that everyone can try if they are unable to receive immediate therapeutic help from medical practitioners. While they might not solve the underlying issues causing the bouts of sadness or depression, they can certainly help with maintaining reduced negative thoughts and emotions.

Try talking to a close trusted friend or relative about anything that bothers you, or try writing about it in a journal. The main aim is to get the negative thoughts and emotions out of your system, to name and acknowledge them.

Take some time out by simply relaxing or resting, or go outside for a walk to take a break from any work that you are doing. Take time to smell the roses and look around at nature.

Try some relaxation or meditation techniques, if you find it hard to concentrate or meditate on your own, try playing a relaxation or meditation video online such as on Youtube or any similar online source.

Make sure that you are getting enough sleep at nights and that you are not feeling tired too often. Deprivation of sleep can cause a person to feel more negative and lethargic.

If you’re working on a particularly hard major project, list everything that has to get done and break them down into smaller projects that you can get done and give yourself small prizes for accomplishing each task.

Try some grounding exercises by taking approximately two to five minutes focussing only on your breathing and relaxing all your muscles.

All of these ideas can help you to try to help yourself feel better within yourself, but above all, try to spend some time really listening to your inner self. Try to pinpoint any major issues that are bothering you and making you upset the most and try to find ways to solve or reduce their affect upon yourself.

Use art or craft as a way to distract you from minor smaller issues that are not majorly problematic. Try using your art to let out some of your negative emotions and to try to reduce their affect on you.

If you are interested in learning how Self Help Art therapy can help you reduce your stress and negative emotions and thoughts, my new E-Book Creative Happiness might be useful to you. If you’re interested in reading it let me know and I will let you know when it’s available.